I used to love watching "House". Bertie Wooster with an American accent, as a curmudgeon doctor, was intriguing to a girl who grew up reading my mother's Merck manuel (advice: don't do that at thirteen when you have a headache). It, of course, was predictable. I knew that at 9:26 the patient would code! The only problem with the show was that it failed to recognize the cost of having House as your doctor. I wanted a scroll showing the cost of each additional test and exploratory surgery. Or maybe a quiet voiced golf announcer that whispers commentary-- "House has chosen a second MRI which will cost $6200."

I feel the same about HGTV. Yes, it's interesting TV. Yes, it has exposed millions to the concepts of functional design  But where is the reality of making those decisions  It's great that the "Property Brothers" and "Love It Or List It" show people the possibilities of remodeling. It is the ultimate in recycling. But can they really remodel the entire house for $30000? No. It gives the viewers a false idea of what the reality of costs are. Even using the cheapest of materials, it's highly unlikely they can achieve that budget even if they are not paying for labor. I want a scroll of expenses. Those granite counters-$4500. The free standing sculptural tub- at least $3000. It all adds up very quickly. The contractors we work with are superb at giving accurate numbers. If Hillary was better prepared she wouldn't have the confrontation you know is coming-the heating system needs replacing and you are not getting the second bath! And there shouldn't be the confrontation at all. The better educated the client, the less disappointment in the end. It is the professional's job to make sure that the client knows what's coming. I realize that especially in older homes, you sometimes don't see the full picture until the walls are down. Preparation for an unforeseen obstacle should be part of the project before you start. Having licensed pros evaluate the systems on the front end helps prevent surprises.

Then there is the decorating aspect. Jonathan at least takes his client shopping. Maybe that is not a job I would give to the builder, but he does take into account the clients desires. Hillary is so often accused of not listening that it gives designers a bad name. The "reveal" should be joyous as many don't have the ability to envision a finished product. But it shouldn't be shocking. Clients should be involved every step of the  way. Each family is different  Everyone has their own style-even if it is undeveloped.  A good designer teases that out. And if the $30000 can't cover the construction costs, how on earth does it cover three rooms of furniture and accessories  Well-it can't be good quality.  Notice that often the curtains don't reach the floor-just my pet peeve. Custom curtains are not inexpensive. But they fit and will last decades if made of good materials  Because these shows are about instant gratification- 4 weeks??-really?--custom work tailored to the needs of the client is often impossible.  Yes-Home Goods is a great store-but do you want all your lamps and accessories loaded into a shopping cart? It becomes just space filler. Nothing personal or meaningful.

Probably the designer that I think shows reality best is Candace Olsen. She doesn't promise instant. She actually makes a presentation to the client to show finishes and fabrics. But there is still no discussion of costs. Candace used good materials. Many are things she uses are licensed in her name  to lighting and fabric companies. The results are lovely, but it comes at a price.

It's not that every project is expensive. Sometimes changing lamp shades and paint can reenergize space. Finding those treasures stuck in a closet can add personality and personal connection to your rooms. Little things can make a big difference. Armed with a good furniture plan and a list of priorities mean the search for the right thing can be fun. But that shouldn't rule out spontaneity . If you find a piece of art that speaks to you-buy it. The curtains can wait!

It all boils down to communication between the client and the professional- whether it's the architect, contractor, or designer/decorator.  They should be listening to you and interpreting who you are into a functional, beautiful space. You should have a budget and establish priorities.  Before the first truck pulls up to your house, you should know what you are getting. Dr. House is often dealing with mystery-design shouldn't be.  No yelling "Clear" at 26 minutes after the hour-and hopefully no drama!

Like many of you-I love Houzz. It's easy to get sucked in and before you know it, you've been clicking away for an hour. Design crack.

 Last week in their e-mail update, Houzz featured a kitchen with some interesting elements, so I clicked on to read the story. Maybe I never read far enough or maybe I was oblivious, but I saw the comment section for the first time. I was horrified at some of the things I read. Just because you CAN comment doesn't mean you SHOULD! 

Interior design-done well-should be very personal. It should suit the taste and functional desires of the client only. The designer is an interpreter and facilitator. Sometimes the client goal is to make an impression on the outside world, so that must be part of the equation, but as I designer, I understand, I don't live there and certainly the viewers of Houzz don't live there. But the level of comments was outragous. "Ugly", "stupid", "impractical"-- everyone seemed to be an expert on what was right for this family-that they didn't even know! When did people decide that A) anyone else cares about your personal opinion? I doubt the home owners rushed to rip out the 2nd island because cheergirl12 thought the flow was too tight. And when did people decide that B) sharing their every thought was a good idea? It's ok to think something might not be for you, but you don't actually have to post it for the world to see.

I am always surprised when I am at someone's house and they feel the need to apologize for how it's decorated since I am a designer. I go visit people because I love their company. It's rare that my taste is just like someone else's. If I only decorated to please myself-the world would be a boring place. You should never have to apologize for your home-(unless it's dirty-then clean up!) Your personality should shine through. So remember, when you attack another's design choices-you are attacking them. 

The picture above is of Meryl Streep's kitchen in "It's Complicated". Didn't you just love that movie and that house? The director was Nancy Myers who has a wonderful sense of how to communicate "character" through set design. She also did "Something's Got To Give". I absolutely love this kitchen. I want to be there roasting that chicken-and Alec Baldwin can come too! But it could never be my kitchen. Too much stuff, too many surfaces to get olive-oily. So I can appreciate it while knowing it's not what I would do for myself. I would never think to write Ms. Myers and ask her how on earth would a real cook clean those lamp shades.  And I would never critique someone's house in person-unless the purpose of my visit was to help with design. And then there are certainly nice ways of offering suggestions.

The vitriol I see in comments has me shaking my head.   And why get bristly with other commenters over a wallpaper selection? It becomes a little on-line battle, a bit like high school. Has HGTV made  everyone think they are experts? Has Twitter, Facebook, and every site's comment section made us believe that others really care what we think? The 1796 postings to David Brooks NYT column doesn't have him changing his views, so Houzz commenters,  get over yourself. It's just wallpaper!

If you comment here, I will read it or delete it, but please don't copy it to cheergirl12!

Sooo-confession. I "resolved" to do a blog post every week. Well, as you can see today-I finally posted one I wrote in January and now we are 6 months past New Years. I guess I have no future as a media mogul! But speaking of "media moguls", I have been thinking about Martha Stewart lately. We have the funniest card in the shop that mentions Martha's productivity while in prison. There is some truth to the caption-"What the hell did you do today?"

In the 90's there was tremendous backlash against Martha. Many women thought she put too much pressure on them to be everything- bread winner and bread maker. I loved her magazine personally and still use her recipes. I never thought her message was "do it all" but just to do something to make life prettier, more organized, or tastier. But I am afraid, as many people do-we overreacted. Many people have abandoned cooking and entertaining. Some basic housekeeping! But when we fail to include these simple pleasures in our life, we are also failing to pass them to the next generation. We get many young women in the shop who yearn for a sense of traditionalism. They are tired of throw-away consumerism and wish they had their grandmother's things to use and preserve. Furniture that comes with it's own little screw driver and wrench has it place-but usually not for long! 

So pull your treasures out from under the china cabinet and share not only their loveliness but their stories with your young people. MEN AND WOMEN! Teach them an appreciation for fine furniture that will last them a lifetime. Show them how to set a table and make a bed, so they can take these skills to their own homes. That old Junior League cook book, languishing with it's chocolate smears-use it-maybe with your kids!

Martha is having a renaissance these days. ( no-not the Match.com story!) The New York Times recently ran an
article about young people returning to craft. This is the link.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/25/business/media/for-martha-stewarts-new-fans-tattoos-meet-applique.html?_r=0

I love sociology. Why is it the person so many in my generation reviled has become a role model for our children? My assumption is that in this data driven world, we have little that we actually produce. We look at Pinterest and repost the pics, but how many of us are sewing, crafting, or cooking? It's nice at the end of the day to hold something up and say "look what I made or accomplished". 

So be resolved-find one thing a day to make your life a bit sweeter. It could be as simple as a vase of flowers or go all out and make your own limoncello. Find one of your grandmother's plates and let you daughter use it for jewelry. Let your son have free reign in the kitchen to create his own barbeque sauce just in time for father's day. When your head hits that perfectly made bed at the end of the day you can know you have an answer to "what did you do today?"

(Left in my drafts from January 22!)
I don't make resolutions. Maybe fear of failure. However, I try to make goals and keeping up with the blog was one of them. It's the 22nd of January and I am finally getting around to it!

I was thinking last week of the "house" as a character in our lives. Maybe something I read about Downton Abbey, I guess. Some houses are named which gives them a certain personification. We look to them to be our sanctuary-hopefully a bosomy grandmotherly hug awaits us there at the end of the day. But while we "resolve" each new year to lose weight or exercise, we rarely take stock of the place we spend the majority of our time.  As much as I scrutinize my arms, they will never be Michelle Obama's, but if I turn that scruitiny to my surroundings, I can create a place of peace and comfort.

I would like to suggest we use the same self evaluation on our houses. I've seen too many people move in and stop. I am astounded at the number of people who apoligze for their house the minute I walk in.  You would never stop coloring your hair-why would you stop keeping up your house. As Nate Berkus recently said-the best decorating is clean up! Throw out the old magazines. Clear out the clutter and go to Goodwill. Then you can step back and look at paint or deteriorating lampshades.  Look up from the TV and notice the stage on which you have set yourself. Is it you? 

I love design and I love history. I love how the material culture we choose to celebrate reflects the times in which we live. It's true in fashion and in interiors. So when I look at the new trends I want to unravel their significance to the moment in time. Where did it come from and what does it say about where we are going?

Those of you who follow design or read shelter magazines will have noticed two trends that have shaped the past few years--sharp, citrusy colors with a '60's pop feel and a minimalist neutral palette with a French feel. Both of these visions started in high-end fabric and furniture lines and filtered down to the masses. (Much faster than trickle-down economics!) When you think about why these become important to us, you have to look at what is happening in society. 

Why the 60's influence? The 1960's were a time of great cultural shifts and uncertainty-similar to what some people may be feeling today. You probably see the influence most  in Bohemian, hippy chic fashion. For home fashion  it's hot pink, orange, and turquoise in bold graphics. Those of us who are young baby boomers can feel a since of security in that time period even though the country was in flames. We were safe at home, too young for Vietnam, eating junk and watching Bewitched. And remember, it's the baby boomers who are buying high-end goods, despite what TV tells you. That sense of nostalgia drove not only home fashion but Mad Men, which drove fashion-it begins to feed on itself.

The other recent trend is the neutral linens with European style furniture. Think Restoration Hardware. In a time of economic downturn, people don't want to be seen as flaunting their wealth. Simplicity begins to rule the day-look at  the shift in art  from before the French Revolution to after. Excess goes away. There is also a belief in design psycholgy that a narcississtic personality thrives on a neutral ground because then they become the decoration. We certainly are living in a time when the desires of the individual are celebrated.

So that is where we have been-but where are we going? After this last trip to NYC and meeting with the representatives of designer fabric lines I think we are headed back to the '90's! The colors I saw in fashion were jewels tones-not quite the clear tones of the 90's but smokier. Amber and jade and bordeaux. Not only are the colors reminiscent but so are the textures and the details. Opulence is back with a vengeance. So why the shift? Is it the very powerful influence of Downton Abbey and English country house style? The Edwardian era in England corresponds to the Progressive Era in America which was a time of the great expansion of wealth and the middle class and empire. Look at the new fall Vogue to see how it translates into fashion. But it could also be the nostalgia for the Clinton era -regardless of your politics, a time when unemployment was at an all time low and we had a budget surplus. Think again of the baby boomers who are actually buying high end goods. Where were you in the 1990's? I know we are still in a time period of high unemployment and growth is weak, but people are spending money again and there is a renewed appreciation for high quality luxury goods. The minimalists grieges from Indonesia and China are being replaced with Belgian tapestries on hand crafted North Carolina frames.

Wow-what a long lesson this has been.Those of you still here-yay! I'm taking away from these design changes a sense of optimism. North Carolina upholstery has no match and its resurgence means jobs, which means spending, which means tax revenues, which means schools. That's where I got to looking at jewel tones this fall! 

I've noticed a trend recently-in style magazines and websites- of books covered in paper. I have vendors who will now sell me a collection of "books" wrapped in old script. When did books become something we have to hide under wraps? It's not like the Playboy's that were delivered in brown kraft paper in the 1960's, which every one was "reading" for the astute articles!

I find that people's bookshelves are such a clear window into who they are. When I meet with a new design client I always look on the bedside table and book shelves to understand them as a full human being. It helps me hone in on design elements that will reflect their personality. 

After a conversation with a good friend (who is an excellent social commentator) about covered books, I went home to see what my shelves said about me. Fiction on one side-alphabetical and non-fiction on the other by subject. Before you call me out for being anal,I worked at Wilson Library in Chapel Hill while I was in college! The fiction is varied-most of Ann Tyler, good Britsh mysteries, my copy of The Awakening  from my senior year, two copies of Exremely Loud and Incredibly Close. I treasure my Harry Potters read with Sam. I have hard backs from the 19th century and dog eared paperbacks mingling in a just a little dust. On the non-fiction side I have every book written about Jackie Robinson or the Brooklyn Dodgers, Elaine Pagels next to yoga, much used travel books on London and Paris, an Italian college text book just waiting for that next trip, and the complete David Sedaris. About two feet are devoted to WW1 and social history of the early 1900s-a new interest. For those of you who will read this that do not know me well, can you get a picture of who I am? This  type of personal information I look for when I go into someone's home shows me in a few minutes their passions and interests. When I help someone in their kitchen I want to see their batter smeared cookbooks. Everytime I open my Julia Child Mastering the Art of French Cooking, I look at the smudge of chocolate on the Reine de Sabe page and think of all the wonderful times had over that cake!

Your Kindle is a great tool. Especially for  Fifty Shades of Gray. But only Amazon will know your preferences. A real book, with its book smell and memories says something about who you are. I can remember clients who had no books, so when I decorated their den I went to the used book store and bought the books I thought they should read. I always thought that was so sad-as if they had no friends. So please-no artifice when it comes to your books. Keep them spines out and proud. You are known by the company you keep.

It's so hot, that I find myself wandering, looking for respite. Here at the shop, the cool lavender and blues of the back room and the shaded creek are lovely, but all I can imagine is how beautiful it will be in the snow! At home, I find myself more and more in the living room with the sisal rug and biscuit colored linen upholstery. It used to be that houses were redecorated for the seasons. When summer came, the wool carpets were rolled up and India mats went down. Slip covers of linen covered mohairs in jewel tones. Wouldn't it be lovely to be able to create such sanctuary for the harsh days of summer, when not only the flowers have faded but so have we? That tradition went the way of servants who orchestrated the transformation for those left behind in the town house as the lucky ones fled to the country. 
      
I think of the house of my grandmother, Katherine Tate, who had such beautiful taste. She lived on a high hill and in the distance you could see the Blue Ridge. A veranda ran the whole length of the back of the house and during the summers, the french doors were open in every room, bringing in the silky fragrance of magnolia blooming in the back. The upholstery in the living room was white  accented with a brilliant green and the accessories were flowers and silver. It was a calm hideaway from the summer heat for my sister Kelly and I as we laid on the floor or invented music on the grand piano. I don't think my grandmother redid the house for the seasons, but that living room stands out as such a beautiful example of refuge from the sweltering sun. The smell of magnolia, heady on a summer afternoon always makes me think of those days. Good luck in finding your hideaway!

After months of preparation , we open on Saturday! Many people have asked about the name-La Tisserande. It means "weaver", which is my maiden name,  in French. When I was thinking of a name, I wanted it to convey my love of all things French. My grandmother, Hazel Weaver took my sister Kelly and me there when I was 13 and I just kept going back. I fell in love with the colors, the smells, and the food. Today both Kelly and I can catch the faintest whiff and say simultaneously "it smells like France!". So La Tisserande sounded good, but I didn't know if it was just right until I began googling images. I found the standard pictures of women at looms, but also weaver birds building their elaborate nests. That's what I do- create beautiful and functional "nests" for my clients. And in homage to my grandmother, who adored birds, both live and encrusted with jewels, the idea was born. So here's to Mom Hazel--and name that honors my family, my inspirational grandmother, and my profession. Kathy